So I was going to make a pb&j alright. And I grab a piece of bread and their was a ladybug. A FUCKING ladybug! Laying its feet and gross hands on my FUCKING bread… -.-
my wallet is empty just like my soul
Dear Mom and Dad,
This is what happiness looks like. Sorry you were so miserable in your own lives that you couldn’t allow me a chance at my own. I went out and found it anyway. I miss you, and will miss you even more this holiday season since you won’t allow me to come back home unless I have a woman on my arm. Oh by the way, we’ll still be using the family recipe for the stuffing, I’m sure it’ll be a hit with our friends.
Your son, his boyfriend, and our spoiled cat
this deserves a million notes omfg
*mortal combat voice* FINISH HIM
SHE USED THE FORCE OF HIM PULLING HER TO HELP PROPEL HERSELF ONTO HIM. THAT’S SOME TACTICAL THINKING DAMN.
she beat his ass with flip flops on thats some serious skill
a wallet that will never be stolen from your purse
that’s fucking brilliant
how, by putting a dollar in gift wrap?
i don’t get it
it’s not gift wrap
then what is it?